Tag Archives: cptsd

What People Pleasing Really Is: A Trauma Response Born in a Childhood That Never Felt Safe

Intro: People often misunderstand people-pleasing. They think it means you’re “too nice” or “too giving.” But people-pleasing is not a personality trait—it’s a survival strategy learned in childhood when your emotional needs were ignored, mocked, dismissed, or punished. A child who grows up unseen and unheard does not learn resilience; they learn adaptation. They learnContinue reading “What People Pleasing Really Is: A Trauma Response Born in a Childhood That Never Felt Safe”

When Your Life Is Built on Beliefs That Aren’t Yours

For a long time, I didn’t realize that not all beliefs are self-generated. Some are inherited. Some are absorbed. Some are taught so early and so consistently that we never question where they came from — we just assume they’re truth. We’re told how life is supposed to look. How work should feel. What successContinue reading “When Your Life Is Built on Beliefs That Aren’t Yours”

Part 2: How to Know What Layer You’re In (Before You Apply the Lesson)

Why misidentifying your layer keeps you stuck—even when you’re doing everything “right” If Part 1 resonated, this part answers the next question most people ask—sometimes without realizing it: “Okay… but how do I know where I actually am?” This matters more than most people understand. Because when you misidentify your layer, you don’t just feelContinue reading “Part 2: How to Know What Layer You’re In (Before You Apply the Lesson)”

Part 1: When Truth Is Placed in the Wrong Layer

Not all truth heals at the same time.
This piece explores why advice that is technically “right” can still cause harm when it’s applied too early—or to the wrong layer of healing.

Part 3: Trauma & Awareness

Triggers, CPTSD, nervous system realizations, and the patterns I couldn’t see until I became healthy Part 1 of my healing was silence. Not the cold kind of silence—more like solitude. Space. Safety. Part 2 was the mindset shift that changed everything: There are only two states in this world—healthy and unhealthy. That applies to physicalContinue reading “Part 3: Trauma & Awareness”

Healing from trauma is much more complex than I ever imagined.

It’s like connecting dots to memories and moments you tucked away so long ago, you forgot they were even there. At first, healing feels slow and steady—just enough to notice that something is changing, but not enough to see where it’s leading. And then, almost all at once, things begin to unravel. Moments that onceContinue reading “Healing from trauma is much more complex than I ever imagined.”